Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.

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  (206): It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts. http://tfl.nu/etp3
  Replies (1) Good night (829) Bad night (1026)
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  (718): View more from New York

  so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood

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  (718): so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood http://tfl.nu/a9i9
  Replies (11) Good night (696) Bad night (1608)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.

  (719): View more from Colorado

  she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  are you serious?

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  (414): i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it. (719): she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her. (414): are you serious? http://tfl.nu/esul
  Replies (50) Good night (1298) Bad night (19428)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.

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  (865): sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself. http://tfl.nu/7igx
  Replies (28) Good night (2936) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta

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  (310): Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta http://tfl.nu/zeqg
  Replies (86) Good night (3127) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave

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  (413): before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave http://tfl.nu/loh3
  Replies (26) Good night (8215) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?

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  (805): do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland? http://tfl.nu/lpb9
  Replies (25) Good night (3060) Bad night (5596)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.

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  (336): This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard. http://tfl.nu/5chf
  Replies (36) Good night (6228) Bad night (1215)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.

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  (513): I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake. http://tfl.nu/fip9
  Replies (8) Good night (4312) Bad night (1096)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym

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  (781): Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym http://tfl.nu/lv47
  Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (486)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?

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  (605): seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys? http://tfl.nu/ijfs
  Replies (9) Good night (830) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD

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  (604): All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD http://tfl.nu/xdt2
  Replies (5) Good night (540) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios

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  (315): It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios http://tfl.nu/u2ql
  Replies (1) Good night (537) Bad night (261)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."

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  (503): The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you." http://tfl.nu/ce1u
  Replies (3) Good night (647) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong

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  (904): The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong http://tfl.nu/o3xm
  Replies (9) Good night (653) Bad night (383)

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