How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
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