There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She has the best kind of daddy issues
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
