guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
