I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
