My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm getting married
To pizza
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
