bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
