i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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