Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
