Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
