she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
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On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
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I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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