: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
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She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
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Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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