i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Randomize
