in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.