Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.

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(801): View more from Utah

just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.

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(210): View more from Texas

My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.

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(514): View more from Quebec

Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(810): View more from Michigan

He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

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(914): View more from New York

Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos

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(254): View more from Texas

He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.

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(408): View more from California

You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.

(904): View more from Florida

Did he?

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