I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.