nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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