Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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