He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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