woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
No...this little piggys going to the bar
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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