The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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