he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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