escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
