I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize