exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Michael Bay diarrhea
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
