I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
