Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
no you cant smoke seaweed
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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