Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Enjoy the penises
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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