good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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