we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
