Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
