my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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