his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I could fuck to npr.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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