I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
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At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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