Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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