Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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