Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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