so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize