Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
