So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
