The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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