I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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