We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
be right there i have to get my cape
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
