New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
