I want to have your abortion
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
