just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
