I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize