Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
