you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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