I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize