your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
