Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
