why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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